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Welcome to the week when we’ll elect a new leader of the free world and watch the existing dictator who rules the college football world jam its iron fist right down another wannabe’s throat. Better still, that’s just one of the SEC showdowns that sound exciting but will change absolutely nothing in the conference that still pwns the sport.

Western Michigan @ Kent State – One of the season’s most entertaining stories…buried on an election night when most of us will be freaking out over which candidate we absolutely hate who is certifiably going to destroy America is going to be elected our new fearless (or fearsome, if you prefer) leader. Nice scheduling, y’all!

Mississippi State @ Alabama – After overturning half of the SEC West’s potentially playoff-bound apple cart, can Ole Miss State do the other half too? You already know this, but the answer is no. No they can’t. Not in the least.

Boston, er, Boring College @ Florida State – Guess who’s going to be the punching bag for a season’s worth of Felony State frustrations. If it weren’t such a totally lame pun, we’d make a joke about this being a Seminole loss for the Addazio era.

Ole Miss @ Texas A&M – The Rebs are pissed their rivals exposed A&M before they could. A&M is, well, ripe for the re-exposing. Too bad the Landsharks aren’t really the Landsharks this year, so A&M just might avoid an embarrassing fall from #4 to #Whatever.

Baylor @ Oklahoma – It’s the program you absolutely can’t bring yourself to support against the program that always leaves you slightly disappointed, so expect some sort of letdown.

Kentucky @ Tennessee – And if, in September, you had this game making a difference in the SEC East, you were already good and likkered up for the start of the season, so congratulations on that.

West Virginia @ Texas – It’s a post-Halloween flashback special! Every time Charlie’s time in Austin looks like it’s about done, he rises from the dead to upset somebody.

Auburn @ Georgia – Sure, it looks like it ought to be a huge game. Back in the day, it would have been a classic SEC showdown. This year, it’s just a game between two teams who aren’t really as good as you think they ought to be.