How does it feel to know that everything you’ve always known to be true is wrong? Alabama is not infalliable. UCLA is apparently a more desirable job that Florida. Tennessee is now a second-tier gig. Stuff’s happening so fast that you can’t even write a good college football blog without having to add in after-the-fact smartassery.
Also, Alabama is fallible. WTF, Tide? Is nothing sacred or predictable any more?
- Alabama – Ohmigodtheskyisfalling!!!!! Nothing will ever be right in the world again. Maybe Nick has lost it. We should’ve gone after Chip Kelly!!! Of course, when tOSU wipes the floor with Wisconsin next week, the Tide will still be in.
- Ole Miss State – Please don’t go, Dan. Please please please please please. (On second thought, we hear Greg Schiano is still available.)
- Nebraska – Hello, Scott? Please come home. Please please please please please. (On second thought, it sure looks like everything’s lining up for it to happen, doesn’t it?)
- Florida – Which was uglier, Gators? Getting beat out for the coach you wanted or getting bat down by a 4-6 FSU? (On second thought, given recent history, what do you think the odds are that Mr. Mullen ends up regretting this one big time?)
- Ole Miss – Rebs dial 1-976-Ohshitweshouldnthaveselfimposedthatbowlban.
- Tennessee – Dang, the SEC really does dominate the polls, and with that disaster of a season, plus the turndown from Chip, the Vols have clearly earned their place in this hot mess. (On second thought, boy did we underestimate what a total hot mess things are on Rocky Top!)
- Washington State – Speaking of begging coaches to stay, prepping for your rivalry game, which is for a division championship, while hoping your pirate doesn’t leave is pretty much the definition of chaos (and it sure showed in the results).
- Illinois – Remember when the Illini started the year 2-0? We’re trying to remember how things went from there.
- UCLA – Let the Season of Irrational Exuberance begin!
- The U – You can still see the wisps of steam emanating from Malik Rozier’s ears from here.
- Notre Dame – And with that, Brian Kelly returns to his customary place at the head of the coaching death watch.
- Maryland & Rutgers – In case they weren’t clear on the concept a combined season-closed 106-10 wipeout should remind them that they don’t belong in the B1G.
- Arkansas – The Hogs are going to soil themselves if Nebraska actually hires Bret Bielema. We’d soil ourselves if the Hogs would bring back Houston Nutt, but that’s just a pipe dream, isn’t it? (On second thought, we hear that Greg Schiano is available.)
- Kansas – Seriously? He’s coming back? (On second thought, we hear that Butch Jones, Bret Bielema, and Greg Schiano are all available.)
- Baylor – Funniest line we heard on TV all weekend: “1-10 Baylor giving TCU all they can handle.”
- North Carolina – If you’d like to truly terrify your favorite Tarheel next Halloween, just go dressed as Nyheim Hines. (On second thought, how is it possible that Mr. Fedora hasn’t been capped yet?)
- Oregon State – 69-10 in your rivalry game? Please please please tell us you’re really bringing Mike Riley back again.
- UNLV – Congratulations on going from “all hope is lost” after Week One to “beat our two-win rivals and go to a bowl” to staying home for the holidays.
- Idaho – Nothing says goodbye to major college football like losing to New Mexico State. Of course, nothing says that you’re not really playing major college football like playing in the Sun Belt.
- UTEP – And in the end, there was just one, so well done, y’all! That winless season sure makes the Miners gig look attractive, doesn’t it?
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